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Mother’s Day is loved by some, and hated by others. For some women, it is a reminder of all that they can’t have when someone is unable to have children. It’s a yearly reminder of their loss.

It can be heartache and anger when other moms complain about all their motherly woes. It’s sadness and emptiness wishing and hoping for a child of your own to love and to hold.

It may also be missing a child that has passed away and all the roller coaster of emotions associated with that. Oh, the heartache that “Mother’s Day” can bring!

So Not Perfect, and So Much Guilt!

For others, it is a reminder of all that we are NOT. The good, the bad and the ugly. It reminds us of how we sometimes aren’t the “best mom ever” like some Mother’s Day Cards say.

We roll our eyes and then feel a rush of guilt flow over us like a wave from the sea with all the regrets, emotions and washed out dreams. What we do best is live for our children and give up a piece of ourselves in the process.

We feel guilt from not doing enough, not cleaning enough, not smiling enough, not being happy enough, for yelling or snapping at our kids.

Then we feel sad when we realize our weaknesses are amplified in our children and we can’t fix them until we fix ourselves.

Sometimes we are sad that we can’t show that we have accomplished anything great and then feel guilty for thinking that! (Because we know that raising kids is great and amazing!) It just doesn’t always feel so great…. again, the guilt.

Joyful Reflection…

Still, for others, it is a time to joyfully reflect on the wonderful Mothers in our lives. How much we love and appreciate them. How much they have given us.

Sometimes, it’s a reminder of how much we miss them. Or it’s a reminder of how much we loved having little children around and how much we miss it.

What Is It For You?

For me, it is all of the above. I love having my husband and children appreciate me. It’s nice to have a day to acknowledge all that we do that goes unnoticed and all that we do that comes so natural.

Gifts are also nice, but really that’s not necessary. It’s just that being recognized feels good once in a while! Or maybe even just a break! (or to use the restroom without little fingers under the door! lol)

It makes me sad when I think about all the mothering mistakes I have made, and how imperfect I really am. How do you expect children to do things perfectly? You can’t!

Do You Miss Things too?

Then, I miss having a baby to hold and sleep on my chest. I miss those late-night feedings and having every day wrapped snugly around rocking a baby.

When your children learn to count and “eleventeen” is your favorite number! When your child says “Bamma” instead of “Grandma” and gets sent to speech therapy to correct it. (But you don’t want to correct her because it’s so stinkin’ cute!!!)

There are parts I don’t miss like the exhaustion from being up all night and then dealing with a cranky teething toddler.

How about wondering if you need to take your child to the doctor in the middle of the night?

Or those nights sleeping on the floor listening to my child breathe when they were really sick. I can do without those days, they weren’t my favorite, but they became a part of me!

They made me stronger, better and empathetic to other moms going through a tough time. You can look a mom in the eye and somehow you understand her without any words.

Nurturing is the Biggest Part of Motherhood

Yes, we certainly do a lot as moms, but so do most women, whether or not they are moms! Most women “mother” other children or people in one way or another. This is just a natural gift we, are given to nurture.

Nurturing or “Mothering” is a God-given quality given to all women. For some, this innate quality is strong and doesn’t take much time to develop it. Still, for others, it is more difficult and doesn’t come as easy.

You Have To Work At It…

Just like muscles in our body, sometimes, it takes a little work to develop this gift from God and become what He intended us to be. We are here to love each other, help each other, teach each other and lift each other.

From the time my oldest daughter was born, I could see she had this gift to “Mother.” When she was the youngest in her Nursery class, she would want to help anyone who was sad or hurt, even when they were older than her. As I said, for some, this gift doesn’t take too much to develop.

For another daughter of mine, she developed it after serving her younger siblings for an extended period of time when I was sick during a pregnancy. It then became like second-nature to her. They both are amazing with kids!

We Are To Take Care of Each Other

I am the blessed Mother of 8 children. Five of them are girls. Each one of them has this gift given to them. It’s amazing to see how God intends for us to take care of each other and women are given a healthy portion of “nurturing” to help accomplish His goals for us.

I miss my mom and Grandma’s terribly! They were all such a light in my life! The “Mothering” continued even after I became a mom myself from one Grandma. She was a light and a gift to me. It seemed like she always knew what to say to lift my spirits and lighten my load.

Each time I left my Grandma’s home, she sent me with some trinket or gift. There was never any monetary value in her gifts, but it was her willingness to give that touched me the most. She was so unselfish and kind. So true to what moms should be!

These kind gestures continued throughout her life. When I left her home, I always felt like I was the “favorite” and I felt loved. I felt lighter and happier. This made me feel like I could do anything! I loved every visit with her!

This is “Mothering” or nurturing at it’s best! When we can lift someone else because we listened and understood, or we just knew how to help them. Sometimes just listening is the best skill we can develop as a Mother or Grandmother.

When you feel like you are “just a mom” watch this little video to lift your spirits. Heavenly Father wants us to know how dearly He loves mothers, and the sacred trust He has given us.

Moms…YOU ARE SIMPLY AMAZING!!!

Listening Is A Way To Show Love

When we truly listen, we show love at a greater depth than just words can express. When we listen and then act or give service, our love deepens for our child, or for the person we are “nurturing.”

This, in turn, has a positive impact on those who receive the “mothering” or nurturing with an open heart.

The Lord Provides a Way

My mom passed away when I was just barely 13 years old. This was a crucial time in my life, however, the Lord provided so many “Mothers” in my life to fill the gap I felt.

So many mothers, that just naturally “nurtured” or “mothered” me! So many moms that cared and freely gave me their time and love.

My Grandma was one that filled a huge void in my life. There are no words to express my gratitude for the gifts that God gives to women who so tenderly and honestly love those around them.

I was the recipient of so much love and kindness from so many Mothers that “mothered” me and wanted to help in some small way. They will never know how much I needed that “mothering” and how it bound up my wounded soul.

You Can Still “Mother” Those Around You

So, to the women who weren’t able to bear children, you can still “Mother” those around you and fill a gap. You just never know all the good that you already do! I am a witness to that!

Don’t ever doubt your ability to lift others to higher ground and show love in so many small ways. Just kind words can change someone’s life for the better. A “mothering” heart is all that is needed.

Whether you are a mother, a grandmother or a woman who wishes to be a mother… may the Lord bless you to continue to lift, serve and love unconditionally to those around you! May you “mother” to your heart’s content!

Be Kind To Yourself Mamma! Be Kind to Others!

Mother’s are simply put: AMAZING! So let’s be kind to ourselves! Sometimes, that’s so very hard. It’s really quite easy to be hard on yourself. Seriously consider all your strengths when you are feeling weak.

It’s easy to criticize other moms, but the way the Savior would treat me or you is the same…with kindness.

He would be gentle and fair. The Savior would be understanding and encouraging.

He wouldn’t find fault or throw rocks, but simply encourage me to change my ways and do better if a change is needed.

I read this amazing article about moms, and I could relate to all of it. It talked about how sometimes the “weight” of motherhood is so very heavy. It also described it as a “sacred weight.”

Remember, You Are Enough!

This video was touching. Never forget that YOU are enough!

May you have the strength to live happily; the gift to lift others and the peace that comes from knowing that you are making a difference to someone else and you are always enough!

Now hug your child, hug your loved ones, hug someone lonely, hug your mom, and be kind to yourself…

YOU ARE ENOUGH!

Happy Mother’s Day!

~Amy

P.S. When the days are hard, read this article and see if there is something there that can help you enjoy motherhood just a little more.